People wonder and some have asked me, why are you obsessed with the Camino? Or, for a non-believer, you spend a lot of time writing about a Catholic Pilgrimage route, why?
Part of their question(s) are valid but maybe a bit mis-stated. I have no particular obsession with the Camino (or any other thing) but, I am very interested in what my time on the Camino offered me. It is an evolving offering and an enduring challenge so yes, I do spent time thinking about this offering and, I choose to discuss it here, in my blog.
In my life and, I don’t think my life is that much different than most other people’s, certainly not other American’s, there have been phases in which we experience similar but different things. For me, they’ve gone something like this.
- Birth to young adulthood was spent learning all the basic things that humans need to survive and thrive in the modern world. Besides walking, talking and beginning to learn, there’s how to get along in groups, learning to become responsible for ourselves, education and finally, living on our own using the aforementioned tools. Let’s face it, some do better than others even at this basic phase. Some have access to mentors, education, and life tools that others don’t. A basic but undeniable reality, these children had no choice in their situation, but it can doom them to a very different life than I’ve known.
- Young adulthood and this may overlap with the end of Phase 1 a bit but it’s the time where you have some freedom, you probably make a lot of mistakes because while you were taught certain things, you hadn’t really learned them until you fall and scrape you knee a few times. Sometimes this phase laps into the next, relationships and marriage. No matter how, it can be a very selfish time, a lot of me. What I want, we still haven’t had to figure out the WE thing yet.
- For many, Phase 3 is both rewarding and destructive. Rewarding because they begin their family. You strive to provide for them, you want your children to be better off than you were, this was drilled into our heads. To do this, you work, for most in the United States, both parents work. Kids go off to school, mom goes to work and, in my case, I went to the airport far too often and was gone far too much. It’s what the breadwinner does, right? For some, this is where the destruction can begin. Like an aging car, routine and required maintenance is overlooked or skipped all together. Relationships suffer. Our focus is often on the wrong thing, that promised shiny object called success or the American Dream, whatever that actually is.
- For those who survive Phase 3, this next phase is hopefully very rewarding. The phase where the children leave home, the empty nest. Often, this period is one of rebirth and rejuvenation. There can be more expendable income, more time to do things like travel. If you’re lucky, this phase lasts until the end, staying healthy in all senses of that word is important.
- I’m not going to spend much effort here for some, this can be a lonely and sad place. The loss of a partner or your health.
At this point in my life, I’m in Phase 4. Our children are grown and for the most part happy and healthy, we have grandchildren, we’re comfortable financially, and we’ve been able to travel and enjoy life…except this year. I’m healthy which is critical to enjoying this part of my life.
This brings me to why my Camino of 2017 was so impactful to me. For 2 years I got to plan (once I got to Spain, this all went out the window) and dream about being outside for an extended period of time, meeting people and loving life.
Preparing for this journey brought me great joy as I got to spend a lot of time outside with friends, walking ourselves into shape. Really though, once we were in shape, it was building upon our friendship and, in my case, really getting to know Ann, someone I’ve “known” for years. That has been an added joy.
Arriving in France and then into Spain, I was immediately challenged both mentally and physically. I over came those challenges, a great emotional relief.
I also had time to think about me, who I was, am and want to be. A rekindled interest in mindfulness that I’d been introduced to 40 years earlier. I had time to focus on this with no phones ringing, no emails to respond to and no real responsibilities other than walk and prepare to do he same thing again tomorrow. The simplicity was liberating in all senses of the word. My mind was set free.
Friendships and camaraderie came easily, some of the people I met are now fixtures in my being. Yes, I do not see them as much as I’d like but, they will always be with me and I can call them up in my mind (email or phone) when I need to.
All of these things have allowed me to realign my life and priorities, this is still a work in progress, as it should be, I suppose but, I believe it’s made me a better person. It’s certainly made me a more spiritual person.
Don’t get me wrong, I did not have a religious conversion on the Camino. I have come to realize, with help, encouragement and guidance that many of the things some credit to a faith, exist in all of us. For my friends who believe, keep believing, I hope it makes you strong and your lives positive. I too am feeling strong and positive, we share that.
Am I obsessed with my Camino?, no. I am still learning from it every day, yes. If that’s obsession, then I guess I need to change my answer or you need to change your question.
If what I’m doing and being is an obsession, you may want to join me on my ongoing Camino. The Fall of 2023 is calling.